Burgers.

batburger.jpgA biased comparison of pressed meats.  Why?  Because I want to write a food review. 

Kanab, Ut; The Junction; The Big Red Burger:  It’s called the Big Red because of the high school team colors.  And perhaps because of ketchup.  Catsup.  Thingy.

The big red is a double patty, ham, cheese, veggies delight.  One thing I’m a bit against is pre-saucing.  I don’t like it when restaurants put my sauces on my burger for me.  The Junction is infamous for placing mustard on the burger.  I think it’s too bad.  Add to that the thinner patties and I’m in a bad mood. They do grill the bun, which makes for nice crunchy edges, but the overall burger left me feeling flat and missing my Hermie Burger.

Cedar City, Ut; Hermies; The Hermie Burger:  This is the winner of the competition by far.  It’s a whole lot of food and not too expensive.  Another great double decker with all the essentials, there was nothing I didn’t like about it.

Anywhere, Wendy’s; Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger:  This is a great burger for the price.  I love that they only put mayonnaise on the burger and it’s actually got a leaf of lettuce.  The patty is a little small, but at least they tell you it’s a junior.  I can down 2 or 3 of these daily if given opportunity.

Cedar City, Ut; The T-Bird Grill; The Double Decker Burger:  This is a pretty grotesque burger, but it’s so carnally satisfying that I have eaten it twice.  The bacon is thick but barely cooked, forcing you to yank pieces off with your teeth.  The burger is topped with fry sauce – and I know how I feel about pre-saucing.  It comes in a piece of paper with a toothpick sticking through it.  It’s also usually leaking grease, sauce, and the blood of innocent lettuce.  It’s not the best tasting burger, but guaranteed to make you feel more like a jackal when you eat it.  It rises far above the Carls Jr. mess level and creates a whole new land of mess that hasn’t been seen since the time of the 60s roadside diner.

Now I am bored of writing about burgers.

And I’m hungry.

-Greg

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4 Responses to “Burgers.”

  1. Cornelius Says:

    Me too. Now I feel the need to carnally satisfy my inner Jackal. I also have to second the thing about the Hermie Burger. This Manly Pile of deliciousness is the pinnacle of all burgers everywhere. I might even make the bold statement that it beats all patties, steaks, ribs, and any other cut of meat you can think of from any animal walking God’s Green Earth that we’ve learned to take cuts of meat from!

  2. Greg Says:

    Ye Gads! Any other cut of meat? I’m gonna have to get meself one of these delectable burger thingies!

  3. Ben Says:

    McDonalds double cheese burgers are only a dollar now too. I bought a couple of these the other day between classes and wondered why immediatly after. I don’t remember eating a hamburger that oozed grease before. I think I would have remembered because it was horrifying. It’s like a round little grease sponge with a couple pieces of cheese. But maybe McDonalds customers like grease sponges. I don’t know because I haven’t been there for a while.

    Can somebody explain to me why there is the single, strange, flimsy pickle in the middle of the burger with a couple dots of those tiny onions sprinkled around it?

    That T-bird double decker burger is sounding pretty gud, but I am partial to In-and-Out Burger. Now thems is good eatin’. They have this one that’s wrapped in lettuce (protein style) that is actually better than the one in the bun.

  4. Talia Lee Says:

    Ah yes, the McDonald’s double heart attack…. Okay, so maybe the double heart attack is more like
    the double quarter pounder, or the old double big mac, which i sincerely hope they never bring back.
    ah, the memories….. wipes away a tear.

    but not all the double cheeseburgers there are greasy spots found on main street. you can actually
    get a half decent one if you know who to go to and when they’re there. too bad i’m not there
    anymore or i’d make you a really good one. but as for the little onion sprinkles, since it’s only
    a dollar, they figure they can stiff ya using rehydrated onions that I personally think are kind of
    tasty. And with the pickle, just be glad that you didn’t get loaded up on them. sometimes they do
    that.


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