StarCraft Adventures: ‘Molasses in Galoshes’ Rides Again

Tonight, beginning at 8:00 PM, five geezers gathered online to reminisce about old times by playing StarCraft, a game from their freshman year of college. Eight years ago, they had played this game into the dark-hours of the morning, sacrificing sleep, grades, and respectability.

They defied girlfriends and early morning professors to gratify their lust for digital blood. Two of this group had gotten into a 3 AM altercation with a would-be sleeper after returning from the computerized contest of wills, shouting about who had won, who should have won, and how they could have won. After being pushed to the ground, cursed at, and threatened with tired raised fists, the two sheepishly apologized, continueing their video game ravings in a more civilized fashion in the sanctity of their 10×10 dorm room.

Others had been labeled “Social Lepers” by less-than-understanding, Electronic Learning Center patrons. They braved and even accepted the title, recognizing its ironic truth. In an action completely in keeping with their characters, they watched the screen  of the ELC patron to discover her opinion about them in an instant message to a friend. Upon her leaving, they commented, “Hey baby, we’re just a couple social lepers for hire,” and turned their socially diseased attentions back toward their screens.

Tonight they were separated by hundreds of miles of ground and had not played the game in years in most cases. Their wives peaked over their shoulders to read comments about whether women knew anything about Mentat assassins. Children fell asleep at the feet of their feverish fathers, as the nursery in one household doubles as an office.

The games, the fellowship, and the conversation were all very good. And the game speed was very bad. Unfortunately, one user’s computer is on a shared connection that made the games play like turn based Axis and Allies. Hopefully the game speed will be fixed in the next installment of Irresponsible Youth Adventures: Revisited. All in all, it was a good old-nerd, retro game outing.


4 Responses to “StarCraft Adventures: ‘Molasses in Galoshes’ Rides Again”

  1. anah Says:

    TO ALL THE WIVES: Our husbands are Gamer Geeks. For us this means lots of late-night isolation in a cold bed. To ease your boredom, and get some GOOD companionship on these lonely nights, perhaps you could, if you live in proximity to each other, have a girls night out. or in. Bring the kids, put them all to bed at a decent hour, and have a slumber party. Our husbands won’t notice. Promise. Or, if distance is an issue, call each other and chat for hours. Most of us have cell phones which have free minutes after a certain hour. USE THEM! USE THEM ALL! Mwa-ha-ha!! Be creative. Dance naked in front of your husband and see if he looks. If all else fails you can call me and we’ll commiserate…er, chat. 208-697-8291. I’ll share my favorite recipies or whatever. ;-)


  2. Greg Says:

    Woah! Teah goes insane with jealousy! Even to the point of publishing her digits?! Amazing the things that the craft can cause the women to do!

  3. Greg Says:

    I also have to say that I was quite fond of the adventure and now face the risk of trying to play it a lot more often. Like once per week… On wednesdays or thursdays… or fridays…

    or all of the above…

    Just thinkin’ is all.


  4. Cornelius Says:

    We do need to do it again. Hopefully we can have better speeds. I think I’ll use my L33t Ninj4 Skillz and play at the ELC in the future to avoid problems. And this time we need some PvP. Yeah, I’m talkin’ to YOU, Jared!

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