Are we there yet?

Joseph will be in the states in less days than the day of the month on which he was born, and home by two days less than his and Greg’s birth days combined.

How’s that for not breaching security?  Ha ha.

Anyway, he’ll be home sooner than expected, which is good all around. I was going to say that it was not good financially, but I really don’t care about that anymore.  For both of his deployments I was excited (and a bit jealous) that he got to see more of the world AND that he got to go to war (what could be more exciting?!). I was confident that I could keep things running smoothly at home, by myself. Happily. And for the most part I have done that, happily. Of course I’ve had my days, or in some cases, my weeks, but that’s to be expected. The point is that I was excited for Joseph to go to war. (Don’t think I wanted to not be with him. You’d be wrong.)  I didn’t mind doing things by myself. The funny thing is that I’m tired of being independent. I don’t want to “go it alone” anymore. At all. I want someone to lean on, to confide in, to stay up late talking to, to kiss any time I want. So I’m glad that the leader, the Patriarch, the provider of my family is coming home to stay. For Good. or Evil. We’ll see which it is when he gets here. My money’s on For Good.

For those of you who know me, I’m sure you can imagine me scrambling around trying to get everything ready a month earlier. Go ahead and laugh. I’ll be glad to know someone is enjoying this. I knew that once the holidays were over, the end would come very quickly. I didn’t plan being sick in Cedar City for 3 weeks after New Years or Joseph’s Grandma dying a week after I got home from said Cedar City. Now that I’m home from Holidays and Funeral, Joseph’s homecoming is right around – wow, This corner.

Somehow everything is getting done. I feel like I’m racing from one thing to the next with no time to eat or sleep or play with Jack. My energy and drive flow through me as fast as a Trackmania race car driver, to the point where I’m waking up every two hours at night to see if it’s time to get up yet. Luckily for me, I have the Boise Temple and Yoga to thank for my sanity. Temple once a week, yoga 3 or more. (Easy child care for yoga. Traded babysitting for temple.)

In the temple today I had a very strong impression that Christ was holding me, like a child, and rocking me. And I knew that He’s taking care of me, and that everything is going as it should, as he planned it to go. And that I’m racing around even though I don’t need to. And I really needed that today. I wanted to cry out all of my frustration and impatience and all of the loneliness and sorrow that I’ve had, while he held me and I couldn’t. I don’t think I’m ready to let go of it yet, and also, if I let it go now then I won’t have the drive to get everything done that I want to.

Also, I’ve been really worried about the changes that are going to happen when Joseph comes home. I’m sure that this is what the comfort I received in the temple was referring to. That the transition will be smooth, he’ll like what I’ve done with Jack and the house and the finances, that Joseph will be able to provide for our family while finishing school, that we’ll find an affordable place to live, blah blah blah, and that he’ll still like me and think I’m pretty. (I know he’s supposed to. That doesn’t make it so. I also know that this is a common worry with me every time he’s about to come home, and that he always does like me. So it’s an unwarrented worry. It is still a worry, though.) Also, we’re going to be moving rather soon after he comes home. We should be well established in Cedar City before Joseph’s birthday. I’ll let everyone know when we’re there. I’ll probably throw a party. Maybe a game night. That sounds fun.

Somehow, everything is flowing smoothly, and I’m on track with what I want to accomplish before Joseph returns. And I am being blessed with time. I have time to play with Jack and work on his schooling (shapes and color recognition, and drawing straight lines to learn how to print, lots of fun stuff). And I even found time to plan an activity for and attend a Family Home Evening hosted by a New Member of the other ward that meets in our church building. Wow. Yay for missionary work. I Love It!

Oh crap. I just saw that it is 1:00 a.m. and I have to get up early for yoga. Hopefully tomorrow will be a slower-paced day. At least I get to go to Paul’s house to watch movies tomorrow night. Today was good. I did a lot of things that I had been procrastinating. (yay for me!) And now a little something to make you laugh…a true story about….ME!

Last week I stayed at a friend’s house in SLC after Joseph’s Grandma’s funeral. I planned on leaving the next morning, but woke up to a lovely stay-in-bed-with-hot-chocolate snow storm. I spent the day cleaning Angela’s apartment and having fun with Jack while Ang was at work. That night we went to some sexy clothes stores in the mall to see if I could find anything to wear when Joseph came home. I didn’t find anything I liked there, so I bought a shirt from Gap that reads Desi(red). Part of the proceeds go to the Aids in Africa fund. After that we went to the tanning salon that Ang frequents.

I have never been even inside a tanning salon and quite considered them to be akin to Skin Cancer Salons. They were not anathema to me, but I considered them only fit for dumb rich girls and white trash (also usually dumb) and as such, they were quite beneath me. Ang told me “good things” among which was that tanning makes stretch marks less visible. (Mine are from Jack). Since I am rather self-conscious about this, I decided it sounded like fun. And it was only 5$.

The receptionist, after hearing that it was my first tanning session, said that I should only tan for 8 minutes. Ang looked at me and said “you burn too easily”, then told the receptionist “Only 7 minutes”.  Now, I have not been in the sun long enough within the last two years to even get a slight burn. I don’t remember the last time I had a sunburn. I wasn’t worried about 7 measly minutes.

As I listened to The End (101.9) on the headphones I understood why people get addicted to tanning. Tanning felt like a day on the beach. The UV lamps warm you like the sun they’re imitating and they even have a little air conditioner blowing on you with a cool, almost warm beach-like breeze. It was a much needed relaxing day on the beach in the middle of a snowy mountainous Salt Lake City. I enjoyed every one 7 of the minutes. I’m glad I enjoyed it because later that night I found out that…

I burned from head to toe. And in places that have never SEEN the sun. Not even peeked at the sun. For 3 nights I couldn’t sleep. It’s been one week. I’m just starting to peel. And parts of me are still red. And still hurt. I should have known this would happen. I didn’t remember until it was too late. Whenever I have a tan it’s because

I always burn, and That turns into a tan.


And let me be a less pasty-white



2 Responses to “Are we there yet?”

  1. Dr. Lycka Says:

    A blistering sunburn doubles your risk of getting a skin cancer. This year 1,000,000 Americans will get skin cancer. Do you relally want to paly with death or disfigurement?
    Dr. Lycka
    The Canadain Skin Cancer Foundation

  2. anah Says:

    Good thing I didn’t blister. Maybe this guy speaks mostly French, but I’d think at least he’d know how to spell Canadian.

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